“MY MIL SENT ME A \$3,360 BILL FOR WATCHING HER OWN GRANDSON — WELL, I GAVE HER EXACTLY WHAT SHE ASKED FOR!”
I had to leave town for a week-long work trip—something I rarely do. It broke my heart to be away from my 4-year-old son, but it was important for my career, and thankfully, my husband couldn’t go but had some help.
My mother-in-law, Janice, volunteered to stay at our place and watch him. She insisted it would be no trouble. “I love my grandson,” she said. “It’ll be our special bonding time!” She even made it sound like she was excited about it.
I thanked her profusely, cleaned the house, prepped meals, made activity lists, and even left \$300 in cash on the kitchen counter—you know, for emergencies, takeout, gas, or just as a thank-you gesture.
When I returned, my son was happy and healthy. So far, so good.
But on the kitchen counter, still sitting there—untouched—was the envelope of cash.
Now taped to it was a note in all caps:
“WHERE IS THE REST?!”
I stared at it, thinking: The rest of what? Confused and already tired from travel, I called her immediately.
Me: “Hey, Janice, what’s this note about?”
Her tone was icy and self-righteous.
Janice: “Nannies in our area make about \$20 an hour. I took care of your son 24/7 for a week. That’s 168 hours. Multiply that and it comes out to \$3,360. So… I’d like to be paid accordingly.”
I blinked. Speechless. She was dead serious.
Me: “Wait, you offered to do this.”
Janice: “Yes, but it was WORK. You didn’t hire a babysitter—you hired me, and I’m worth it.”
And that’s when it clicked.
If she wants to be treated like a paid nanny and not a loving grandma, fine.
Me: Grinning “You’re absolutely right, Janice. Thank you for clarifying your position. Since you’re his nanny and not his grandmother, then let’s go over a few things…”
Her: “What do you mean?”
Me: “Well, first off — professional nannies usually undergo background checks. I’ll be requesting one. They also carry nanny insurance. Do you have that? And you’ll need to fill out tax forms—because I’d never pay that kind of money under the table. You’ll be responsible for income tax, social security, and Medicare deductions. Oh, and I’ll need itemized logs of what you did each day with him, as well as proof of any overtime or overnight surcharges.”
She went quiet.
Me: “And while we’re at it, I noticed he had cereal and chicken nuggets for four dinners in a row. That’s not exactly premium nanny care. If I’m paying you \$3,360, I expect receipts. And perhaps a refund for subpar service.”
Janice: “That’s—! This is absurd!”
Me: “YOU turned love into a transaction, Janice. So I’m just following protocol.”
The next day, she dropped the whole thing, muttered something about “just trying to make a point,” and hasn’t brought it up since.
But just in case?
I kept the note, snapped a photo of the untouched cash, and printed out IRS guidelines for domestic employees.
Because if she ever tries that again, oh boy—
She’ll get exactly what she asked for.
